A Pause

It’s time for a short blog break–a pause in the action. My memoir will be published sometime in September–you’ll be the first to know! Thanks, everyone, for reading and keeping up with my adoption search and childhood memories. For me, each week was more fun than the last. I have truly enjoyed sharing my stories with you and always love reading your comments.

Young Love: An Adoptee’s Memoir tells the story of my 35 year search for my original identity. It is in the final stage before publishing and I am very excited. I am forever grateful to you, my readers, and can’t wait to share the book with you.

handmade greeting card

Search Angels

I can’t imagine searching for my birthparents without the help of search angels. Their personal experiences motivate them to help others. They volunteer their time and knowledge!  In 1983, before I had even heard the term, search angels, I asked for help from a group in Montreal called Parent Finders. I remember saying they were my adoption angels.

Following our initial phone chat, the president of the Montreal Branch sent me a letter describing the mission of Parent Finders:

“CONGRATULATIONS. By contacting an organization like Parent Finders, you’ve made the first step in a very difficult situation. Parent Finders has two main functions. The first is to try and reunite you with the one you are looking for, and second, to give you lots of moral support, whether through phone calls or personal contact.

I will teach you everything I know about searching, and if I don’t know the answer to a question, I will do my best to find you the answer as soon as possible. 

I am sincerely looking forward to working with you. I was able to find my mother and hopefully I can help you to find your family.”

Years later, I was trying to add my name to a list of people searching for family. Maybe a birthmother or birthfather was looking for me! Within minutes, a search angel was assigned to help me. That was in 2014. Now, Vicki is still there for me—always helpful and kind and supportive. Vicki was adopted in Ontario and she lives in Michigan. Annie is a search angel with a closed Canadian Facebook group. Annie, like Vicki, is there for me any time, on any day. She has a wealth of experience and knows where to find answers. Vanessa is a genealogist in Montreal who volunteered countless hours filling in the blanks on my heritage family tree. Another closed Facebook group, DNA Detectives, has search angels and members supporting people all over the world, 24/7. I have received support more times than I can count. These are just a coupIe of examples of search angels who helped me in my search. 

I joined DNA Detectives five years ago and there were about 30,000 members. Today it has 107,359 members! I believe it is important to note that the Facebook groups I belong to are closed groups. We can’t overemphasize the importance of confidentiality in searches. Both Facebook groups clearly define their roles and have administrators monitoring conversations, or threads, as the internet calls them. One-on-one support is available in private messaging. Search angels and administrators are all volunteers looking to help others.

Young Love, An Adoptee’s Memoir is dedicated to all searchers and search angels. Identity is sacred—never give up! I hope this blog post expresses my gratitude for the years of assistance and support I have received from search angels.

From My Card Collection

It’s All About Family

Mom and Dad
Bonnie, Ian and Stephanie

I searched for my birth family for many years. I didn’t stop searching until I had identified my birthparents. My search took 35 years! Curiosity never let me down. I was driven by an innate desire to know my original identity. Throughout my search, I felt I was asking for information that belonged to me! I believe that identity is personal and sacred.

Many events occurred during my 35 year search. It was a fascinating journey. I wrote an early journal after the first five years. After that, friends and family encouraged me to record new events along the way. Eventually I decided to get back to writing. I incorporated my first journal into this memoir. After a couple of years, I was able to say that I was working on a book!

My book is a memoir. And, it turned out to be about my family and my life, not just the search for my birthparents. This memoir is for my family–my husband, my children, my grandchildren, and future generations.

My memoir is also for the families of my birthparents. By knowing them, I hope to honor the memories of my birthmother and birthfather.